In case you don't know what the Oscars are, click here. If you haven't heard as yet, Avatar and The Hurt Locker are going to win everything. So here we go! (Click 'Refresh' on your browser for updates).
9.15pm (Trinidad and Tobago time): There should be about one hour of pre-show stuff on the red carpet. I must say, of all the films nominated for Best Picture (there are ten this year) my favorite was Tarantino's Inglorious Basterds. I think Up In the Air is the most overrated film of the year.
9.30pm: Things just started with Neil Patrick Harris (Doogie Houser?) He's singing in a black, sparkling, sequin suit. Steve Martin and Alex Baldwin are our hosts. They were just lowered onto the stage. I'm feeling bored. Been working too much, as usual. Time for some tea...No wait can't miss the first two awards--the supporting actor categories. Then again I think it's clear who's gonna win. Wait, is this supposed to be funny? Anyhow, quick run for tea. Brb.
Oh they just showed us Sandra Bullock...she looked like she was really forcing laughter. Wait Steve Martin just said something funny, in relation to the film Precious (the depressing one with the evil black mother). Martin said, "I loved Precious because for me it's the one film that lived up to the video game,"
Hmm things have improved. Lots of laughs. Martin just pointed out that The Hurt Locker''s director Katherine Bigelow used to be married to Avatar's James Cameron. Martin said Bigelow, on being nominated, sent Cameron a gift basket. Baldwin added, "with a timer". Martin: "Cameron replied by sending her a Toyota". Hilarious!
9.44pm: Best Supporting Actor nominees: Matt Damon (for his sexy rugby legs in Invictus, and despite the South African accent) Woody Harrelson (for his bald head in The Messenger), Christopher Plummer (for that beard in The Last Station), Stanley Tucci (for the creepy haircut he had in The Lovely Bones), and Christophe Waltz (for turning in the most fucking hottest performance in years in Inglourious Basterds). Waltz wins!
Waltz said, "Quentin, with his unorthodox method took this ship..." something something "there's no way I can ever thank you enough!" (Cue get off stage music...) Blah not a good acceptance speech.
9.52pm: Why is George Clooney looking so vex? Oh Up just won best animated feature. I liked it. But I also LOVED Mr Fox and His Friends.
10.00pm: "Our next two presenters are so young they don't know who we are," Steve Martin just said, introducing Miley Cyrus and Amanda Seyfried. LMAO.
10.16pm: Boring categories. Writing and stuff. Wait The Hurt Locker just won best original screenplay. Ahh a touching tribute to John Hughes. Hmm why is the audio bad? It does not seem to originate from TV 6...
10.54pm: WOA. Big gap people. Some hilarious stuff, especially for the best make-up award, which went to Avatar. No wait, that whole movie was CGI. Oh it went to Star Trek. Precious won an award for adapted screenplay. The screenwriter had a very, very dreary acceptance speech. I heard it from the kitchen. REALLY bad.
10.56pm: I'm guessing Monique is going to win Best Supporting Actress. She wins, says, "I would like to thank the Academy for showing that it can be about the performance and not the politics..." She then rattles off a list, thanking Oprah and her husband. "Baby, you were so right, God bless us all". Monique had, going into the awards, said she was not preparing a speech. That speech was prepared, and surprisingly lackluster considering that her performance was really a star going into tonight.
11.07pm: OK big downer. Avatar just won best Art Direction. A really geeky looking guy came up and with teary eyes said "thirteen years ago my doctors told me that I was not going to survive" ??? He didn't say what. Survive a snow storm? Golly it was depressing. Wait what is Sandy Powell, winning costume designer for Young Victoria, wearing? She dedicates her Oscar (her third) to costume designers for normal films (as opposed to period films and muicals). "This is for you, but tonight I'm gonna take this home," she says.
11.30pm: More boring stuff. The Hurt Locker picked up some more awards. Looks like Gingy in the comments section is right when she warns of a Hurt Locker sweep. I liked Hurt Locker it was a competent action film. The performances were what you would expect: Hollywood's idea of the sensitive, yet manly, soldier. Ahem. It was ok. But otherwise I wasn't amazed.
11.49pm: Dancers dancing to the scores of the film nominated for Best Score. Interesting. Yawn. What a pleasant suprise, Up won for Best Score. I think Up was actually one of the best films nominated this year. After Inglourious Basterds I think it's the film I'd most like to see win Best Picture. Cool that it beat Avatar too.
12.02am: Monday 8, Feb, 2009: Gingy in the comments below just pointed out that the Academy appears to have forgotten to include Farah Fawcett in its tribute of those who died in 2009. Really bad. Apparently Roger Ebert and Jane Fonda are already Twittering about it. This is going to snowball into a nasty controversy that Oscar will not be able to live down. See more here.
12.07pm: TYLER PERRY: Alec Baldwin just walked up to me and said, "Man I loved you in The Blind Side"!
Perry announces another win to The Hurt Locker. Is anybody in the comments below doing a tally of wins thus far? Locker seems to be dominating...
12.15pm: My favorite category. Best Foreign Language Film. Without a doubt it was Michael Haneke's The White Ribbon (closely followed by A Prophet). WHAT? The Secret in Their Eyes --from Argentina--wins. Am aghast. Apparently, the film is sentimental. I think Rogert Ebert predicted this. Ha Ha one of the film-makers just thanked "The Academy for not considering Na'avi (the language invented for Avatar) a foreign language". Then he gets flustered and is chased off stage. One of the more enjoyable speeches tonight thus far though. Sad, but true.
12.26pm: Best Actor. Jeff Bridges hasn't won as yet but he's tearing up from Michelle Pfeiffer's tribute to him. George Clooney is nominated. Why? The other nominees are worthy, especially Morgan Freeman. Colin Farrel on Jeremy Renner and a bed they shared on a trip to Mexico: "before any rumours start it was just spooning!" The Oscar goes to Jeff Bridges.
Jeff says, "Oh! Thank you Academy members! Mom and Dad, yea look! Thank you mom and dad for turning me on to such a groovy profession". Then a tribute to his mom and dad who "loved showbiz so much". "I feel like an extension of them," he says, touchingly. He praises the amazing Maggie Gyllenhall. Best speech of the night: relaxed, sincere and charismatic. There's George Clooney again looking like he wants to cuss somebody. Really George, make an effort, it's the Oscars!
12.41pm: "Every British Prime Minister should end up in a relationship with a wonderful queen," Martin Sheen says, delivering a tribute to Best Actress nominee Helen Mirren. It is clear that Carey Mulligan deserves to win this award. Sandra Bullock is expected to win. Gabare Sidibe also deserves to win. She cries as Oprah delivers a tribute to her. This tribute procedure is annoying. It's a little too solemn.
OMG is Sean Penn drunk? He really really messed up his speech. Anyhow Sandra Bullock wins. She goes up to Meryl as though she's about to hug her then blanks her! "Did I really earn this or did I just wear y'all down?" To Sidibe "Gabby I love you so much." To Mulligan, "Carey your grace and intelligence is so overwhelming, it's sickening." And she adds, "Meryl you're such a good kisser." Best Best Actress acceptance speech IN YEARS!!!!
12.52pm: Barbara Streisand presents the directing award. WHAT IS SHE WEARING? Katherine Bigelow wins. She is--shockingly--only the first woman to ever win this award. She deserves it; the other directors in this category were so-so. "There's no way really to describe it; it's a moment of a lifetime," she says.
12.58pm: Tom Hanks presents Best Picture. Again (he's done it a few times before). The Hurt Locker wins. The total tally for the night is six wins, surely the most for the night. Steve Martin on closing, "Ladies and Gentlemen the show was so long that Avatar now takes place in the past!" A wrap, folks. Let's do this again soon.